Today's the day...
The last three years of my life boils down to one day. How sad is that? it is 1 am and I am still up trying to get everything done. I now have to throw together a PowerPoint and then I can head off to bed. I have been so close today to losing it several times. Kalaree is an angel, she has really stepped up to the plate and makes me so proud to know that she is that kind of a girl. My portfolio ended up being 177 pages. The research is 25 pages. I am so ready to be over with this and pray that it goes quick and painless. I am not sure what I will do if I don't' get the approval. I am so scared that the committee will be like no not good enough, you need to go back and defend again in the fall. I am so emotionally and physically exhausted right now. It is amazing how when you really feel like you have nothing left you can push threw. Guess that is what the Lord means that he won't give us anything that we can't handle. I know that this was all his plan. I can't imagine it not because I couldn't of planned it any better or made it happen any other way. So many times we just don't realize that the challenges really are blessings. I am not sure what this blessing is but I know that I just have to make it threw one more day. 9 short hours from now I will be standing in a room with three individuals that will tell me whether or not I am capable of doing what I have been trained to do. Sorry for the late night ramblings of a crazy person. I just am finally to the point where the tears are flowing easily. I am not sure if it the time of night, the exhaustion, or the fear. It is so hard to keep going but I know that I can and I just need to push through this.
David and Kezri made it to Oregon today. Kezri is having a good time. Grandpa Mike has promised her Wild Waters once they get to Seattle. She should love that. grandpa mike got her a mini DVD player for the trip and about 5 new dvds. Grandma Jean took her clothes shopping and so now she has her school clothes. I can't wait for David to get home. I love that he is getting to spend time with his dad and that the girls are getting to know them, but I sure miss him and Kezri.
Kami has been missing David rather bad. She drew him the saddest picture today. However I am so impressed because of what she drew. It just shows how much she is growing up. It was her crying with all these arrows pointing at her. She had a full stick figure. With a body, 2 legs, and 2 arms and a full face with a frown and tears. Rather sad but it does show how much developmentally she is growing. She begged me to buy her school supplies today. I was surprised when we had bought the other girls that she didn't say anything then. No she waited till today (and we were at office depot because I ran out of toner) and then she says, "you didn't buy me any." So she picked out a box of crayons, markers, scissors, glues and a box. Such a silly girls.
Well enough late night ramblings. I am feeling better and should get back to work so I can get to bed.
David and Kezri made it to Oregon today. Kezri is having a good time. Grandpa Mike has promised her Wild Waters once they get to Seattle. She should love that. grandpa mike got her a mini DVD player for the trip and about 5 new dvds. Grandma Jean took her clothes shopping and so now she has her school clothes. I can't wait for David to get home. I love that he is getting to spend time with his dad and that the girls are getting to know them, but I sure miss him and Kezri.
Kami has been missing David rather bad. She drew him the saddest picture today. However I am so impressed because of what she drew. It just shows how much she is growing up. It was her crying with all these arrows pointing at her. She had a full stick figure. With a body, 2 legs, and 2 arms and a full face with a frown and tears. Rather sad but it does show how much developmentally she is growing. She begged me to buy her school supplies today. I was surprised when we had bought the other girls that she didn't say anything then. No she waited till today (and we were at office depot because I ran out of toner) and then she says, "you didn't buy me any." So she picked out a box of crayons, markers, scissors, glues and a box. Such a silly girls.
Well enough late night ramblings. I am feeling better and should get back to work so I can get to bed.
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