Giving it up

As most of you my loyal readers know I have been rather down lately. What you don't know is that I have been REALLY REALLY down. Crying every night, frusrated every morning, plan and simple hating life. We haven't heard about the extension but I have a reall feeling it is not coming. So we are having to make some decisions and I am not liking the choices. Basically it looks like we will not be buying right now. Both the realitor and the mortgage broker said that waiting would be a better deal than trying to get something now. Have I told you how much I hate to wait? So house buying is now out the window till this summer. They feel that we would be better off doing it that way. Really what is 6 months. But hey I hate it. Then there is the whole thing with David and his search for work. Again it is that waiting thing. I keep hoping for things that just don't happen. David keeps telling me that if I didn't have any expectation then I won't be disappointed when things don't happen. Yea, easier said than done, right? Well, anyways, I was talking with Mikaela about it all and she basically told me to give it up. Why is it that I have to carry all this? Don't we have a Savior that came to take all this from us? So this is what I am doing. I guess that since I am not privy to the "big plan" i should just give it away and let it go. So as it stands right now the plan is to let the Lord lead our family in the direction that it shouldbe heading. We will relook into the house buying thing in a few months. I am not getting involved in David's job hunting, emotionally I can't handle it right now. I am just going to work on hanging out and doing what I would do in my every day life. So that means getting up in the morning and goign to work, coming home and being a mom and a wife. Later when things are not so rough we can make it happen. Now let's hope that things will improve in my own emotional well being.